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SMOOTH FORBIDDEN PEACH – A crime punishable by death! Snatched from the clutches of high-flying aristocrats deep in the Orient, these peaches really are forbidden. Concealed in jars of yoghurt, smuggled onto ships before daybreak and transported across three oceans, nineteen sailors perished so that this smooth blend could make its way through the docks of Greenwich and into your lucky hands. And what thanks give you? A few measly coins? Be gone with ye.
RASPBERRY MOONSHINE – A gargantuan Kraken had it’s tentacles wrapped around a ship. Writhing in tumultuous waters the beast crushed the vessel with it’s powerful grip, splinters the size of trees exploded into the sky above. We knew there would be valuable cargo floating in the water so we daringly made our move and tacked towards the beast. We got close, close enough to feel a disturbance beneath us. Flying faster than a shot out a cannon, the crew recovered as many barrels as we could net, altered our course and left with great haste. To our delight the barrels contained a rare, delicious raspberry moonshine; sweet and intoxicating. We shall toast to our good fate this eve.
CAST-AWAY COCONUT – A wild and treacherous storm had blown our ship off course and we were lost sailing on open ocean for days. Becalmed, our rations were running low and the crew were beginning to look at each other with ravenous glee. Days trailed by with all but the slightest of winds to guide our way until we saw land in the distance. Our luck had turned. It was paradise. The little island was covered in trees bountiful with coconuts. We developed a recipe that harvested their delicious, refreshing flavour as a delicacy, safe in the knowledge that one day others would enjoy such a taste in the same way we did.
ALPINE BERRY – Our expedition into the mountains had left us weary. Most of us had avoided crevices, avalanches and snow leopards until we reached heights no man had climbed to before. And some men never would. But there, atop the highest peak, we found it. The fabled garden in the sky. Rife with berries and mint-leaves unrivalled in freshness, we filled our packs and began the long journey home to deliver the now-sacred goods to those fortunate enough to sample them.